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Writer's pictureRusty Pencil

74 awful, yet funny, gardening puns to make your eyes roll.




The world of greeting cards is awash with puns. You can’t be considered a true humorous greeting card publisher unless you’ve cut your teeth on some daft and silly word plays.


Not to be left out, I've written a load of amaizing gardening puns for all you garden lovers. Some make great gardening birthday cards. Some are simply funny gardening cards.


There's planty of them. Read them and reap.


Let's waste no thyme. Sow here goes:


Vegetable puns


Lettuce celebrate


Tomarrow is another day


I love you from my head tomatoes


You're amaizing!


How old? Romaine calm


You leek stunning in that outfit


I carrot believe it!


That shallot of candles


That's a turnip for the books!


Oh my gourd!


Enjoy some peas and quiet


For he's a jolly good fennel


You're no has bean


Swede Caroline!


My heart skips a beet


You look radishing


New job? Hope your celery is good


Kale Caesar!


Let's celerybrate!


You rapscallion!


Are you pulling my legume?


I've been struck by Cupid's marrow!



Herb puns


I herb it through the grapevine


Eat, drink and be rosemary


How thyme flies!


Let's chive the night away


We're mint to be together


Never a dill moment


I feel very comfrey


He's grumpy. It must be his sage


Flower and plant puns


Thistle while you work


When our tulips meet


That's vine by me


You're always on your fern!


It's just one of rose things


A poeny for your thoughts


Aloe, aloe, aloe. What’s going on ‘ere, then?


I canna believe it!


You make me daisy


I'm head clover heels


Get some ice from the freesia


Here's to the fuchsia!


I love you more every dahlia


Aster la vista, baby!


You are very poppyular!


Phlox this nonsense!


Fruit puns


You're both a swell pear


I'll always be here for you, kumquat may


We're applely married!


My cherry amour


You’re one in a melon


Congratulations on your greengagement!


I'm speachless!


I'm eternally grapeful!


General gardening puns


F*R*O*N*D*S


I blame global worming!


Have an unbeleafable birthday


It's a case of trowel and error


Why the lawn face?


Well done smarty plants!


Yew are sexy!


Have a weedy great birthday!


That's a bit mulch!


I love you mower and mower each day


Olive you!


Have you botany plants recently?


You snailed it!


You wood not believe it


You're simply the pest!


Forking hell!


When all is shed and done


You're living on the hedge


He drives an autumnmatic


What a nice pair of anise


And that's it. I can't bear this torture any longer.

















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